Try to guess which Christmas carol is substituted for each number.<P> 1. Bleached Yule<BR> 2. Castaneous-colored Seed Vesicated in a Conflagration<BR> 3. Singular Yearning for the Twin Anterior Incisors<BR> 4. Righteous Darkness<BR> 5. Arrival Time 2400 hrs - Weather Cloudless<BR> 6. Loyal Followers Advance<BR> 7. Far Off in a Feeder<BR> 8. Array the Corridor <BR> 9. Bantam Male Percussionist<BR>10. Monarchial Triad<BR>11. Nocturnal Noiselessness<BR>12. Jehovah Deactivate Blithe Chevaliers<BR>13. Red Man En Route to Borough<BR>14. Frozen Precipitation Commence<BR>15. Proceed and Enlighten on the Pinnacle<BR>16. The Quadruped with the Vermillion Probiscis<BR>17. Query Regarding Identity of Descendant<BR>18. Delight for this Planet<BR>19. Give Attention to the Melodious Celestial Beings<BR>20. The Dozen Festive 24 Hour Intervals<P> No, I didn't make these up - some "friend" sent them to me - but all gratuitious applause will be gratefully accepted. I'm not particular when it comes to applause.<BR>

1. Bleached Yule - White Christmas<P>2. Castaneous-colored Seed Vesicated in a Conflagration -- "Chestnuts roasting on an open fire. . . ."<P>3. Singular Yearning for the Twin Anterior Incisors -- "All I want for Christmas is my two front teeth. . . ."<P>4. Righteous Darkness -- "Oh, Holy Night"<P>5. Arrival Time 2400 hrs - Weather Cloudless -- "It came upon a midnight clear"<P>6. Loyal Followers Advance -- "Oh, come, all ye faithful"<BR> <BR>7. Far Off in a Feeder -- "Away in a manger"<P>8. Array the Corridor -- Deck the halls (I have a gruesome story about this, if anyone wants to hear it)<P>9. Bantam Male Percussionist -- Little Drummer Boy<P>10. Monarchial Triad -- We, three kings. . . .<BR>11. Nocturnal Noiselessness -- Silent Night<P>12. Jehovah Deactivate Blithe Chevaliers -- G-d rest ye, Merry Gentlemen<P>13. Red Man En Route to Borough -- Sandy Claws is Coming to town<P>14. Frozen Precipitation Commence -- Let it Snow<P>15. Proceed and Enlighten on the Pinnacle -- Go tell it on the mountain<P>16. The Quadruped with the Vermillion Probiscis -- Rudolph!!<P>17. Query Regarding Identity of Descendant -- What child is this?<P>18. Delight for this Planet -- Joy to the World<P>19. Give Attention to the Melodious Celestial Beings -- Hark, the Herald Angels Sing<P>20. The Dozen Festive 24 Hour Intervals -- 12 Days of Christmas<P><BR>How does a Jewish kid from Texas know all these?

I would really like to hear the Jewish kid from Texas' story about decking the halls in a gruesome manner - oy vey .........

Well, it had to do with a girlfriend named Holly. . . .<P>------------------<BR>=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=<BR>Jeffrey E. Salzberg, Lighting Designer<BR>This Day in Arts History: <A HREF="http://www.suncoast.quik.com/salzberg/arthist.htm" TARGET=_blank>http://www.suncoast.quik.com/salzberg/arthist.htm</A><BR>Online portfolio: <A HREF="http://www.suncoast.quik.com/salzberg" TARGET=_blank>http://www.suncoast.quik.com/salzberg</A> <BR>"Compliments to Jeffrey E. Salzberg's subtle lighting effects. . . ."<P><BR>

LOLOL - and what is a Jewish kid from Texas doing with the girlfriend named Holly? and please don't say "decking" - sorry couldn't resist.

My favourite carol goes...<BR>Cue music....<BR>While shepherd's washed their sox by night all seated 'round the tub,<BR>A bar of Sunlight soap came down and they began to scrub.

..And of course;<P>"Good King Saurkraut looked out<BR> On his feets uneven..."

or........Chipmunks roasting by an open fire......

"Lo, how a nose e'er blowing" is another interesting one, from a sister who thought the Coventry Carol was about lollipops (she has grown up quite a bit since then . Then, there's "O comma, comma, Manuel, and rancid cats in Israel..." You wouldn't believe the look on her face when she finally found out those were not the words . <P>------------------<BR>~Intuviel~<BR><A HREF="http://www.freetown.com/Uptown/HaightAshbury/1055/ballet.html" TARGET=_blank>Balletica</A><BR>

Good King Wenceslas phones up his local Italian restaurant for a takeaway pizza.<BR>"Certainly, your Majesty" says the Manager ... "Would you like your usual"?<P>"Yes please" replied the King "deep pan, crisp and even".<BR>

According to the Alaska Department of Fish and Game, while both male<BR>and female reindeer grow antlers in the summer each year (the only<BR>members of the deer family, Cervidae, to have females do so), male reindeer<BR>drop their antlers at the beginning of winter, usually late November to<BR>mid December. Female reindeer retain their antlers until after they give<BR>birth in the Spring. Therefore, according to every historical rendition<BR>depicting Santa's reindeer, every single one of them, from Rudolf to<BR>Blitzen........had to be female.<P>So there.

It makes sense, Basheva. Chaps would never be so stupid to pull a sleigh round the world in 1 night. But don't you think it was clever that they persuaded the girls to use their names, so that they got the credit?<p>[This message has been edited by Stuart Sweeney (edited December 14, 2000).]

Well, they could be The Reindeer Trockaderos

Once again females doing the work of the world ................sigh

On further thought - let me see if I have this right .....<P>the elves do all the production work and wrapping of the toys......<P>Mrs. Santa Claus does the cooking, cleaning up after all the elves and Mr. Claus...plus she has to scrub that incredibly sooty suit he comes home with........<P>The female reindeer pull that heavy sleigh all around the world all night long.......<P>And he gets all the cookies and milk the kiddies leave for him ...and....all the credit.....this sounds familiar......