Watch out for the Vampire Nutcracker!
Baltimore Theatre Project
45 W. Preston St., Baltimore, Md

This is the story of a brother and sister who become Vampire-Victimized and must fight back. The sister is bitten by a vampire and goes nuts; the brother has to cure her vampire fever.

In case the nonsense title with its unpronounceable first word wasn't sufficient warning, along came a box containing: a red-and-gold tinsel garland; a small round metal canister labeled "Simulacrum" and, in turn, containing a pink rubber "Voodoo Man" with a smiley face, two rubber balls with smiley faces, red tinsel and three pages of literature about the Voodoo Man (product specifications, a warning, etc.).

The box arrived at the office a few weeks ago. Its contents were promotional material for the current show at the Theatre Project, a rambling, unfocused hodgepodge titled Pferdzwackur's Vampire Nutcracker and produced in cooperation with Towson University's graduate theater program.